Is watching porn cheating?

This is something that I’ve been thinking about lately. Keep in mind, never in my life have I watched porn, nor have I ever had the desire to watch porn. I have no reason to. I am in a faithful relationship with a man that I love with all my heart and soul, and he is the only man I ever want to be with, physically, emotionally, romantically.

Is watching porn, while in a relationship, cheating?

In my honest opinion, yes, using or watching porn is cheating. What reason would you have to watch unless you were wanting to masturbate? I can’t think of any other reason. If you’re in a relationship, why not wait until your significant other gets home & be with them romantically? Even if you are a man, and it’s not the right time for your female companion to be romantic, there are more ways to be romantic than just intercourse, isn’t there? There’s oral sex!

Oral sex isn’t for everyone, I get that. I, for one, used to really dislike doing it. But I’ve learned to like it, and I enjoy being intimate with my husband like that quite often. I know it’s something that he enjoys, and while he does enjoy it, he NEVER pressured me into doing it to him. I’ve always been under the assumption that cheating is breaking a vow of your marriage. When you take your vows at your wedding ceremony, you are

My wedding vows went as follows;

“I, Jessica, take you, Earl, to be my lawfully wedded husband, my constant friend, my faithful partner and my love from this day forward. In the presence of God, our family and friends, I offer you my solemn vow to be your faithful partner in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, and in joy as well as in sorrow. I promise to love you unconditionally, to support you in your goals, to honor and respect you, to laugh with you and cry with you, and to cherish you for as long as we both shall live.”

When I took my vows and married my husband, the love of my life and my best friend, I meant them! I highlighted the “faithful partner” above, because by watching porn or using porn, you are being UNfaithful to your spouse.

Here are a couple scenarios for you to ponder.

  1. You go find a person to have sex with. You have sex with them. That is blatantly cheating on your spouse. I don’t think anyone is going to argue with that.
  2. You go WATCH someone have sex with someone else. You never touch them. You just watch. You masturbate while watching. Would that be cheating? I personally think it is because you sought out someone in order to be sexually aroused and masturbate. No, you don’t touch them, but you watch them in something that is supposed to be intimate, and you “get off” on it.
  3. So, say you don’t engage with someone in person, nor do you watch them in person. But say you engage with them in video chat, online, or through a website. There are PLENTY of websites I’m sure that allow this. Not only websites, but apps for phones. You masturbate through this video chat, allowing her to see you, and you see her. You’re watching her and you masturbate. Is this cheating? I think so. Simply because you have become unfaithful to your spouse.
  4. Okay so you don’t get to see someone doing these sexual acts live, but you watch a recording of them pleasuring themselves, or watch them with someone else. It turns you on and you get off on it. Are you still faithful to your wife/husband simply because someone hit the record button on a video camera and you watched? I don’t think so. You sought out that video and YOU hit play. You are cheating on your spouse.

There are other scenarios that I could throw out there for you, but I think you get the gist of my thinking. Porn is cheating. You are seeking out another woman or man for sexual gratification instead of the one you are in a relationship with and the one you married to.

I have always been raised that one of the only reasons to get a divorce is because of adultery.

“So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore, what God has joined together, let man not separate.” Matthew 19:6

I grew up going to the Church of Christ, and I went there from the time I was born until I moved out of my parents house. I do still go occasionally, but not nearly as much as I should.

Now, don’t get  me wrong, because this is MY personal belief and I know that not everyone believes in the bible and all that stuff, but I DO… 

“You have heard that it was said, “Do not commit adultery.” But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” NIV Matthew 5:27-28

So even there is nothing romantic going on, especially if you are doing scenario 2, 3 or 4, you are still committing adultery therefore not being faithful to your spouse. I do believe that the above passage from Matthew Chapter 5 goes for both men & women.. Women can be just as guilty as being unfaithful, and do the same things as the scenario’s above.

So, what are your thoughts? Is porn cheating?

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